1. A place to find joy amidst my sorrow.

And I continued counting.

In sorrow.

In pain.

In happy.

In mundane.

When I didn’t feel like it.

When I was drained.

It was in my little green notebook,

I lessened the pain.

It was true Joy I sought.

Slowly. Surely.

Eucharesteo revealed.

Thanks … it’s in the giving.

Joy … it’s in the counting.

And counting I did,

One through one thousand.

Jotting each joy,

turning sorrow to praise.

And thankful,

so very thankful,

He’s filled my heart with such grace.

986. staging
987. advent with my girls
988. party blogging
989. together in ten
990. true life when we’re connected to the source
991. a night out for momma
992. riding lessons for Wynter
993. elf antics – having way too much fun!
994. a Christmas angel
995. more party planning
996. Bibles for Iran
997. stocking sneaking, tippy-toeing
998. voxing with my sis
999. stovetop fragrance

One Thousand!!

5 years; 4 deployments; and my Army Ranger nephew is home for good!

This journey, this counting … has brought me many blessings. But most important, it’s taught me to find blessings hidden in the mess. I’m not gonna lie, there were days I’d have to scrape at the very depths of my soul to find thanks, to find joy, to find blessing.

But every time, if I was willing … with my heart raw and wide open to receive … there it was.

There He was.

There hidden in my ugly, imperfect mess was the teeniest glimmer of joy. Until it became easier and expected, and not so teeny and difficult to find. It was more than a glimmer and easier to see … this joy journey. This road to eucharisteo.

I’ve counted to one thousand. Written down 1,000 joyful blessings. Tonight I will begin again, starting with 1,001.

Join me? It will change you. There is joy to be found everywhere, anywhere … and no better time to start than now. Shall I dare you?

Piper was set to have a “marathon” sleepover this weekend.  Her friend {and her friend’s sister} would be sleeping over both Friday and Saturday nights.  But when I met up with the girl’s mom {also a new friend of mine} for the transfer of weekend necessities, she told me they were surprising the girls {and their family, they have 6 kids}, with a weekend trip to the beach.  They’d just closed on their new beach house the day before.  So that meant only one night sleepover.

Only she didn’t want me to tell the girls because she was going to surprise them the next day.  My heart pretty much immediately broke for Piper, as this sleepover weekend was all she’d talked about last week!

Anyway, come Saturday morning, I covered Piper in my prayers and started thinking of some other fun things we could do that day.  A couple hours later, whaddaya know? I get a call from my friend with a crazy idea!  She invited the girls and I to go with for the weekend.  She knew I didn’t have anything else going on and said they had plenty of room.

Yes!  Yes, we’d love to go!  And when we finally told the girls, they were all ecstatic!

With my four, her six, two other friends, and 3 adults … there were 15 of us in 3 cars headed to Isle of Palms, SC!

The beach house was beautiful and well … right on the beach!  I’d never stayed on a coastal beach before … just tropical.  So this was something different for us and we all had a great time!  I even got an adult night out to dinner while all the teens stayed home with the younger kids.

Anyway.  I was worried and hurting for what I knew would be Piper’s hurting heart.  I prayed for her Saturday morning and literally a couple hours later, an unexpected blessing came our way.  It’s one small way {if you choose to look at it that way} to see that God is in the detail business.  He cares about our hurts and worries.

Ann is once again counting 1000 gifts in a years time.  She’s calling it the Joy Dare and has invited all of us to join her.  I’m in!  And so are my girls.

This year especially, I want to be uber-aware … I want my girls to be uber-aware of every detail, every blessing, every gift that comes their way.  How better to understand and recognize that God is on our side, is with us always, and cares about the smallest of details?

These girls are beautiful souls.  They fill me.  They sustain me.

We have a long way to go in our journey together … and I don’t know four better gifts to walk it with.

I love you ladies … more than words would ever do justice … I love you.

Okay so.  A little over a month ago, there was a new parent breakfast thingy at the girls school {about two months too late if you ask me!}.  I was really anxious {in a bad way} about going.  And sure enough … as I’m walking up to the school, there’s little-miss-blondie {have I mentioned, it seems like everyone in North Caroline is blonde?} in her cute skirt, flips, and JCrew shirt.  In full disclosure, I knew it was JCrew, cuz I have the same one.

I so badly wanted to make a cute comment about her shirt and that I have the same one … but I know from experience when cuteness tries to come out of my mouth, all it sounds like is … “LAME!”  So I stayed silent about the shirt.

I go in amongst the throngs of friends and chatty pals … and sit down at a table as a big ol’ wannabe.  In fact, there was a woman with a child already at the table I sat at.  She seemed to be balancing a lot … so I went out of my comfort zone {I even used my sweet dimples} to ask her if she needed any help getting her daughter something to eat {it was a breakfast thingy after all}, and she looked at me like my hair was 10 shades of purple with a ring of fire in the middle!  “NO.” she said … and not so politely either.  And she was no longer at the table when I returned with my breakfast goodies.  Humpf.

And then sits down Molly.  A breath-of-fresh-air Molly.  There were three ladies at my table and we introduced ourselves.  Molly … I could just tell … had a bit o’ crazy going on in her life.  Seein’ as how I swim in a pool of crazy these days … I can spot someone else’s crazy a mile away!  She mentioned she’d only been in NC for 6 weeks … and was from … are you ready for it? … Chicago!  And … she’d visited the small town I came from in Wisconsin!

Crazy coincidence?  Or Divine appointment?  We know what we believe!

Okay … so, back to my story.  As we were talking at the new parent breakfast thingy, a nother blonde lady comes up to Molly and tells her “they’re all sitting at such-and-such a table.”

Sigh.  Another one bites the dust.

Although, we did exchange contact info … so maybe there’s a chance.

And then the breakfast thingy program starts.  And they talk, and they talk, and they talk … telling us all the things we’ve already learned the hard way, and really needed to know two months ago!

When the talking finally ends, they tell us to take note of the grade level taped to our tables and to find our child’s grade level and sit at that table.  While I have my choice of three tables, I notice I’m sitting at 2nd grade.  I also take note that I really need to be networking for Piper.  Yeah, I was desperate like that.  But I decide to stay where I’m at.

And guess who comes back?  That’s right folks … a breath-of-fresh-air Molly!  Turns out her son is in 2nd grade.

Well … the talking starts all over again and this time runs into the time that I have to leave … I’m volunteering at church to greet women as they enter for a ministry called Morning Grace.  And so I have to leave.  And I’m really wanting to ask Molly if she’d like to go, but I can’t.  And so I whisper I have to go.

And I get to church.  And I greet.  When worship started, I sat down.  Looked behind me, and who walks in?

A breath-of-fresh-air Molly.

Turns out she was. not. going to go to the parent breakfast thingy at school, but she promised the blonde lady that snatched her she’d meet her there.  And she was. not. going to go to Morning Grace, but she volunteered to bring a snack.

I sprung {yes! sprung!} from my seat, gave her a hug, and asked which class she was going to.  Turns out it’s the same class I was attending!  {there are like ten different classes …}

Crazy coincidence?  Or Divine appointment?

I could go on and on … but basically, we’ve been inseparable since we’ve met.

I knew it was a match made in heaven when at dinner, I accidentally spit something out of my mouth … and Molly purposefully took a bite and spit it out too.

Molly gifted me with this cute mug {and of course got one for herself too}.  The other side says “with God.”  I texted her one morning with a photo of my mug, and she texted back with a photo of her mug.

OH wait! I almost forgot!  The first morning we met for coffee, as we were getting up to leave, she grabbed my hand and said we needed to pray.  It. was. beautiful!  There is was … in the middle of Starbucks, a friendship sealed with prayer.

And we’ve even gotten our toes painted together!  :)

Here’s a photo of the girls with Molly’s son … he’s a sweetie and a certain Johnson girl may have a little crushie-crush on him!

I know I’ve mentioned Piper’s new friend before, but here are a couple photos of them and the other girls {one is Syndey’s sister, also in 2nd grade}.

And lastly … even babygirl had a playdate!  Her very first one!!  When I hung up the phone with the girl’s mom, this was what I saw … well, kinda … this one’s a reenactment.

I know I’m finished with the 31 Days of Faith posts … but I’d like to encourage you with a few thoughts …

At times, we’ve gotten very discouraged with our new adventure here in the South … we STILL get very discouraged.  But what I believe with all my heart and tell the girls, is that God wouldn’t have us in this place if He didn’t have great plans for us!  I believe it.  I know it.

I wrote this post during a really difficult time.  Even though it was a rough valley for me, I never lost hope.  I never lost my faith … my belief.

And look … just look how He’s rewarded us.

” … Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful
with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things …”
Matthew 25:23

Where are you at today?  Do you believe in His promises for you?  Are you being faithful with little?

I am so thankful He hears us.  He cares.  He rewards those who are faithful.

I’m volunteering this week at our new church’s vacation bible school.  I signed the girls up to attend and given the intentionality of our time at VBS last year, I really thought I should volunteer this year.  Believe me … I gotz a lotta things I could be doing … but I also thought it might be a way to meet more people too.

I’m so happy that I went ahead and volunteered!  They put me in the art room … and … Piper signed up for art!  So I literally get to spend the whole week having one on one time with her {without her sisters at least}.  I’d call that a major blessing!  It’s also giving me little insights and peeks into who she is … you know? those hidden moments and quirks that we don’t always get to see when they’re in school or away from us.  I’m able to quietly watch her interact, think, and create.  Love!

Anyway.

I actually led our small groups this week.  Freaked me out a bit when they randomly handed me the discussion paper … in fact, I “sort of” tried to give it to someone else, and she says to me so sweetly “why are you handing it to me?  You love Jesus.”  Um.  Okay.  Sure … sure I can do this!

And I did.  And it was actually pretty cool.

This week, one of the things we talked about was giving glory to God in all that we do.  You’ve heard the phrase “practice makes perfect?”  When in fact, no one is perfect.  No one can be perfect.  There was only One who was … and we can strive to be like Him, but we’ll never be perfect.  Does that mean we shouldn’t practice or try our hardest?  Absolutely not.  We should be glorifying Him in all we do, and that means we need to try our hardest and be the best we can be.  We need to be all He created us to be.

Whether you’re a mommy at home with your kidlets, a teen working in the mall, or the prez of a company … everything we’re doing should be for His glory.

The lesson made me think of this song by Stephen Curtis Chapman, Do Everything.  And if you have a few extra minutes, listen to his message behind the song.

I often wonder what these two would do without each other.  Where one is … there is the other.  Two peas in a pod and all that.

I often wonder where their lives will take them … will it keep them close, or pull them apart?

I often wonder if their hearts are happy to just be near the other.

I often wonder if they know they’re sisters … or just think they’re best friends.

I often wonder if, when they’re forty, they’ll understand how blessed they are to have a sister.

I often wonder if their children will be friends.

I often wonder if they’ll have daughters … who are sisters … and feel the way I do when I watch them play.

I often wonder if they’ll always have this bond.

I often wonder when they’ll let Hunter join their club. ;)

I often wonder if God knows how very thankful I am.

I wish I could bottle and share, right through this screen, what I experience when I’m here.

Time stands still.  Worries wash away.  Peace sets in.

We’ve been here since Christmas, and while it took me a full 2 1/2 weeks to finally feel completely at peace … I finally DO feel completely at peace.

Oh how their personalities shine through in these photos!  And remember Wynt’s accident?
Her shiner below was a full week & a half later!  It got much worse before it got better {can’t even see it now though!}.

Drama much?

Channeling her inner Jackie O?
Okay, but seriously … she won’t take these off.  We bought ‘em in the local grocery
store and she wears them everywhere.  The pic of her chasing the waves?  She has ‘em on.
Hunter seems to be growing before my eyes on this trip …

Sand burial anyone?  And yes.  As a matter-o-fact, they do eat sand.
Ever since they’ve been old enough to crawl in it!

Island hopping.  Didn’t get many photos this day {actually, haven’t taken many photos at all} …
We visited Long Island … an island believed that Christopher Columbus
first hit when trying to find America in 1492.

And then we have school.  It’s seriously going MUCH easier than last year.  We have a week
left in Exuma, and the girls are pretty much done with their work.  Honestly, Piper
didn’t have too much … and super-student Wynter, flew through hers.
We’ve been working on reading flash cards with Hunter {watch out
Mrs. R, you’re going to be amazed!} … and Tay is plugging along
with her regular homeschool curriculum.

I wouldn’t trade any of this!

And a view of my heaven … here I sit watching the sun rise, reading, writing, praying, gazing, wondering.

And sometimes when the afternoon is coming to a close, I’m back again …
folding laundry, writing, emailing, twittering, reading, gazing, wondering.

Thank you Lord for blessing me with this amazing slice of Heaven.  Knowing the beauty you’ve created here on earth,
makes me yearn for my real Heavenly home all the more!

Yep!  Today’s my birthday!  And in honor of … well, me … I wanted to share four of my biggest blessings with y’all today!

We picked these up on our recent trip to Orlando and the girls were seriously beyond excited to finally pull them out and sport ‘em to dinner on Thanksgiving day.  Whadda think?  Are you lovin’ my things as much as I do?  ;)

Another year older wiser and blessed beyond belief!

We had an amazing time.  I’m smiling remembering what a “magical” time they had.  One night while tucking Hunter into bed, she was squeezing her newly acquired, Marie {from The Aristocats}, with the hugest smile on her face … I’m talking huge!  My whole insides were smiling in return and feeling blessed knowing they were experiencing and feeling something so magical.

Hunter fell asleep before we even got into the park for the “Very Merry Christmas Party”

As I mentioned a couple of weeks ago, I’ve really been struggling.  Just feeling like I’m not good enough.  That I can’t measure up.  Now, honestly … I know it’s all hogwash … but when you’re down, you’re down, right?  The other horrible thing about being down is the enemy has a field day with that!  But here’s what I’ve come to realize … I believe the Lord is working in me.  Preparing me to use me in a big way.  I’m not sure what that is, or what it means … I just feel it happening.

And I believe satan is working double-time to hinder my connection with my Creator.  It started in Israel and only got worse when I got home.  And quite honestly, it continued while at Disney.

I just wasn’t myself.  I felt like I was struggling in so many ways.  I won’t go into all the details, as I’m not sure any of them would even make sense.

But here’s the thing … as I was walking around all these different theme parks … very aware of my internal struggle … I was even more aware of and in awe of my surroundings.  The people that is.  So many different kinds of people … that came from all over the world to see this “magical” place.  I’d smile just watching them …

A dad with bright pink, sparkly, glittery, headband ears.  A tween boy with a Mickey fanny-pack.  Grandmas.  Grandpas working rollercoasters and telling guests to have a “magical day.”  Grumpy teens.  Happy teens.  Moms yelling at children.  Children not listening.  Sick children.  A group of handicapped or elderly.  A boy with obvious developmental delays, clapping and dancing and smiling like nobody’s business {and yes, I may be crying as I’m remembering the pure joy on his face}.

All the while, I’m trying to make sense of it all.  Like there’s some bigger meaning … {shaking my head} I don’t know … like I said, I’m not sure I can make any sense of what’s going on inside of me.  There I was … in the most “magical” place on earth, surrounded by thousands of people, and realizing, we are all part of this great big world.  We’re all struggling with something.  And when the girls and I hopped into a boat for the “Small World” ride … and the music started playing … “It’s a small world after all … it’s a small world after all … it’s a small world after all, it’s a small … small world!”  YES! it.is. a small world.  And we’re all in it together.

The big epiphany … my breakthrough … was understanding, without a doubt, God’s cookin’ something up for me!  And … oh my friends! that makes me smile!  For that, I am thankful!  For that, I’m excited!

Look at these girls … the last time we were at Disney World in Florida … in Minnie’s house … on Minnie’s sofa, was 2004.  Wynter was 5 months old.  Piper had just turned 2.  And it was Taylor’s 9th birthday.

{Tears …} And look at them now.  We’ve added little Hunter to our crew!  Wynter just turned 7.  Piper’s 8.  And my big girl is 15!

Blessed and thankful am I.  Happy Thanksgiving everyone … I pray you receive many blessings, but more importantly … you give many thanks!

We got our share of fireworks, sprinklers {aka, sparklers}, tubing, napping, eating, canoeing, fishing, and picnicking!

The photo below has been my view the last 5 mornings.  Some mornings clearer than others … quite a fog over the lake in this photo!

I’ve sat outside each morning, early.  Coffee.  Silence.  Well, except for tap-tapping of my keyboard, the chippies running all around, a few loons calling, and birds tweeting all over.  Nature at it’s finest.

It’s done a world of good for my soul!  And I’m really going to miss it so …

I’ve also done a lot of praying this weekend.  I mentioned something in this post {at the very end} and it’s no longer a whispering, but a loud, thought consuming, prayerful request.

I’ve started working on this project … prayerfully working on this project.  In order for this to come to fruition, I need to have CJ’s permission.  And right now I don’t.  It’s a book about my life … which in turn, is a book about his life.  And it’s not something he’s endorsing right now.

So once again … I find myself stuck between my husband’s wishes and what I believe God is asking me to do.

I’ve decided to move forward, as it’s something that will take a long time to complete.  No hurry, no rush.  Praying as I go.  I trust God’s plan and voice and know this will all work out for His glory.

{p.s. … be sure to stop over at the MODsquad blog today.  Read about how it all began and find out about a giveaway too!}

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