Do you love this photo? I think it may be a new favorite of mine.
Hunter and I were walking back to the house after a snorkeling trip. She was holding my hand and looking up at me and I caught our shadow out of the corner of my eye … such a precious moment, that I needed to capture it forever.
So … I’ve been hearing, for the first time, about Ali Edwards and “one little word.” I’d never heard about it, and now it’s everywhere I turn. Hmm …
Anyway … I had recently written about my New Year’s goal … to focus on me. Given that, and hearing the premise of focusing on just one word rather than a list of resolutions {which I’ve never been a fan of anyway}, I thought “my word can’t be me.” That’s crazy. Selfish. And really? I’m supposed to document my word as ME?
That goes against every grain in my being!
Wait! Hold up …
Maybe that’s exactly my problem … maybe I haven’t been giving myself enough of me.
I’ve been so busy being everything to everyone else … that I lost me.
So yeah … my word this year? Me. I’m sayin’ it loud and I’m sayin’ it proud.
Taking this time away with my family, couldn’t have been a better start to the year of “me.”
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, quiet reflecting and praying. I’m coming up with something that’s kinda mind-blowing and revealing to me …
Since my MS diagnosis in July … I’ve been so busy just “accepting” it and strengthening my spirit, that I haven’t done anything to “fight” it. As I’ve mentioned, I’m at total peace with my diagnosis. I don’t question “why me” … and I absolutely don’t think about the “what-if’s” of the future. I’ve just accepted it. What will be, will be …
But then I read an article about another woman who had MS … only she fought it. She did all kinds of things to fight it. One year after her diagnosis, she went in for a follow-up MRI … to find out that everything she’d been doing … not only caused no new lesions, but it’d shrunk the one she originally had!
That’s powerful.
I’ve realized I just haven’t been taking care of myself. I’ve been having more and more pain, and a few new symptoms show up. Nothing horrible, but extremely annoying … and I’ve just accepted it. But not anymore … I’ve finally decided to fight it.
I got a recommendation for a new MS doc and called to make an appointment. He is, fortunately, taking new patients … but I can’t get in until the end of June. I had some very good suggestions to keep calling or at least be put on a waiting list … so I intend to make those calls when we return.
And instead of only focusing on strengthening my spirit, I’m going to also focus on strengthening my body! I’ve started to exercise since I’ve been down here. I haven’t exercised in a long, long time. I need it … badly. It hurts and I’m still in pain. Right now, I don’t know if it’s from using new muscles, or a combo of both. But I’m pushing through it. My hope is the stronger I get, the less pain I’ll have.
I’m eating healthier. I’ve gotten quite sloppy with my eating habits … it’s as much what I’m eating as how much I’m eating. I’ve already changed both, and I’m feeling good about it. Actually … feeling great about it.
I’ve been so busy taking care of my family … I suppose being a martyr in a sense. But when I really think about it … it probably all boils down to excuses.
So yeah … I’m proudly declaring … this is the year of me! What are some of the things I’m going to do for myself?
- spend more time in God’s word
- spend more time in prayer
- exercise
- work on healthy menus & plan ahead {with the help of this}
- work on my posture & relax my shoulders {seriously.}
- stay for the style & blow dry when I get my hair colored {I usually have too much “stuff” to do} ;)
- get massages
- start taking baths again
- start reading the piles of books, currently collecting dust
- really focus on my marriage
- laugh a lot more
Whadda think? Pretty good list?
How ’bout you? Are any of you in need of a little self-nurturing? Have you put yourself on the back burner for too long? Have you lost yourself? I urge you to fight. Make yourself a list of what’s most important to you. Start small, you don’t want to set yourself up to fail.
But the “one word” here? Start.
One word: YAY!!!!!!! I’m really proud of you and happy for you, Tracie!! (Doing Meg’s little “Go, Fight, WIN!” cheer for you at this very moment!) I think focusing on yourself is the very best thing you can do!! Those are some very great goals to have. I’d love to be your accountability partner on the exercise and laughter points, especially! (Okay, and maybe the massage one, too! LOL!) I want you to to be happy, healthy, and whole!
You go GIRL! Fight it! this is what I love to hear! xoxo –
for some crazy inspirational stories on fighting your disease diagnosis check out this site: http://www.crazysexylife.com
wow…your words & that article are really powerful…i’m still absorbing to be honest! and you taking care of you…music to my ears!!! i know that with your spirit & your focus on your health you can “reverse it” too! love you!
Great post Tracie! I especially like the last bullet point – “laugh a lot more”. I’ve always been that person who deals with my problems through humor. In my opinion (as humble as it may be), there are very few things as therapeutic as humor! Last year, I was diagnosed with sleep apnea (can we say, “old man problem?”) and was horrified at the idea of sleeping with this face mask on. I brought it home, and wouldn’t put it on until after Scott fell asleep due to sheer embarassment! The next morning, I was greeted by Scott saying, “well good morning Darth (Vader)”. I laughed until I almost peed my pants. Situations like these, where things are out of our control, we have to a.) put into God’s hands, and b.) laugh! So “cheers” you to and laughter! :)
what else can i say except “it is about time”. i think all of us mom’s could use a little “me” time. love ya!
Our lists are so similar!!
I think this is a great post! Most women don’t think about “me”, I love it! We as women tend to forget us and worry about everyone else. I started laughing alot more when I met my love, it is the best thing in the world. I will help on the exercise if you want….. Not sure if your up for the early mornings again when the weather gets warmer:)
i’ve been waiting a long time for “you” to come to this realization. the fact is, only you can truly care for you!! i love that you’ve figured this out sooner than later. i think your approach is extremely healthy and just what your mind, body and soul needs <3