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I'm a redeemed child of God and the momma to four vivacious daughters. I'm passionate about finding hidden blessings in the trials of life, living it out in an honest and open way, while encouraging those around me to believe in better.

21 Jun

purpose

Some of you know … some of you don’t … that I’ve been walking through a raging fire for some time now. I don’t talk about it or carry on {too much} on the blog here. But it’s there. The pain. The fire. It’s always there.

I have a lot of thoughts rolling around and I’d like to flush them out here … writing them out, here in my space, it helps bring purpose and sense to what I’m feeling.

I read something the other day and screamed “YES! YES! That’s exactly how I feel!”

“Blogging has profoundly changed me … I am a mess. I am a contradiction. I am brave and also not.

Working those things out in writing helps me to have peace with it rather than fight it so much. Thinking about my own contradictions in my head brings anxiety. But writing through them gives me courage. Yes, I am a mess. But that doesn’t mean I have nothing to offer.

Hope profoundly motivates me.

I see the world as a half-full glass.

I risk Pollyanna by writing that way but I don’t care.” Emily Freeman, Chatting at the Sky

“I risk Pollyanna by writing that way but I don’t care.”

That’s how I feel. A lot of the time.

I’m in pain. I’m walking a nightmare. But I have hope.

I always have hope. “Hope profoundly motivates me.” And causes me to continue to share … reach out … and breathe Truth into your souls.

I shared just two days ago of my hurt. And y’all responded with love and kindness. To be honest … the purpose of that post wasn’t meant to be about me and my pain. It’s purpose was to be real, to let you know I have real hurts and pain, but I have hope. And it’s purpose was to encourage you with that hope.

There’s always hope.

Many times I absolutely feel “I risk Pollyanna,” when I carry on about hope, and truth, and promises. Sometimes my Pollyanna-like thoughts stifle me. I fear you might be across the screen giving me the proverbial eye-roll. That fear stifles my words and causes me to shut down.

But then a truth comes. Hope blooms. The promises reveal themselves to me once more urging themselves to be shared.

And so … as Emily so sweetly put it, “I may risk Pollyanna but I don’t care.”

It’s my purpose. And I won’t let my pain happen in vain.

Today I’m linking up with Write It, Girl.

Write it girl

 


Posted in encouragement, write it girl, writing


27 Mar

a treasure in the arms of christ

There’s an image in my mind that I just can’t shake …

While at Disney a few months ago, I was waiting patiently on the sidelines while my girls were on a whirly-twirly ride my aging stomach couldn’t handle. And because I’m a people watcher through and through, I didn’t mind at all!

I thoroughly enjoy watching all the comings and goings-on. But on this day one family in particular caught my eye …

I’d been through the same situation numerous times, and found myself smiling as I watched a familiar scene unfold. The dreaded measurement. Who’ll be tall enough to ride?

One sibling was, but the youngest didn’t quite measure up.

It struck me immediately, and I haven’t been able to shake the thought … how many of us feel we don’t measure up … in many of the things we do? As a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a Christian, a student, an artist … a writer.

My hand is raised.

But you know what?

Over the years I’ve had to watch my own girls at that dreaded amusement park measuring stick, not quite making the mark … disappointed and sometimes in tears as they watched their sisters walk onto the coveted ride while they had to wait until they measured just right.

It’s for their own safety after all.

But in the midst of their disappointment, I was able to encourage them with a very real truth … “you WILL one day make the mark … you just need to grow.”

So as we watch others around us making their mark as bloggers, speakers, writers, leaders, and encouragers … I wonder if God’s not saying the same thing to us, “Dear child, one day you WILL make the mark … you just need to grow.” And maybe it’s even for our own safety.

As for those other things … the wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, Christian thing … let me encourage you with these thoughts … Psalms 139:14 says we are “fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Your works.” {NASB}

I’m singing over and over these lyrics from the Sanctus Real song, Forgiven, “When I don’t measure up too much in this life, I’m a treasure in the arms of Christ.”

We are special because we are God’s creation! When we begin to think we don’t matter to anyone else, we need to remember we matter to Him … we are precious in His sight!

Dear friends, we are His treasure! He is at work in our lives … He’s growing us and preparing us for “such a time as this.”


Posted in encouragement, inspiration, write it girl


20 Mar

i’ll wait. he’ll answer.

Standing in the middle of the Christian book section at Barnes and Noble, I find myself completely overwhelmed at this sudden thought, “What can my writing possibly add to what’s already been written.”

And written good. From real writers. Who’ve wanted to be writers for as long as they can remember. Who know what all the technical terms of the English language mean. Like a participle. Or a hanging participle.

I failed English in high school. I had an English teacher who was short, seemed at least 100 years old, and wore her hair in a beehive … with pencils in it. I didn’t like her. And she didn’t like me. And she failed me. But I totally deserved it.

I still don’t like English much. You know, proper English, and proper sentences. Most of the time I can’t think of the words I need … the really fancy ones that razzle-dazzle. I’m more of what you’d call a four-letter Scrabble queen … the five and six letter words seem to allude me. And I might be a little proud of myself for just using the word “allude.”

That’s the real me.

But I digress.

I have a passion burning inside of me to write my story. To share my story. But it absolutely intimidates the heck out of me to think that my four-letter-word writing could have a place on a bookshelf with the greats.

Not to mention … as I mentioned … it seems everything’s been said, done, told, and shared.

Overcoming, Healing, Grace, Gifts, Encouragement … it’s been said thousands of times and thousands of ways.

How is my story any different? How would my words impact in a way others haven’t already?

And then I remember … it’s my God-given story, and my God-given passion.

Sure, I may feel overwhelmed and discouraged at times, but worrying won’t get me anywhere. So instead …

I’m still and He’ll move.

I’ll pray and He’ll listen.

I’ll wait and He’ll answer.


Posted in write it girl, writing


13 Mar

the light of the world

Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world.
God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill.
If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you?
I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine!
Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others,
you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.
Matthew 5:14-16 {MSG}

Prepare yourself! My heart’s become passionate about this topic and I foresee myself sharing quite frequently on it!

We are the Light of the world. Plain and simple.

My passion is this … to encourage you, encourage all of us to shine Light into dark places … starting with our own.

There are many dark “places” in this world. Dark people, dark actions, dark circumstances and situations. Most times, darkness translates into shameful. Things that don’t necessarily bless people by talking about them. So they stay hidden … in the dark.

What I’ve learned? What’s hidden in the dark doesn’t heal.

There are some things we go through in this life that are socially acceptable to talk about and share with others. And then there are things that are embarrassing or shameful and we keep them tucked away into the recesses of our hearts.

But there’s something you should know … the enemy lives in those dark places and he’d love nothing more than for us to keep them hidden and festering … robbing, killing, and destroying every thought or life they touch.

My goal is to be an encourager to all of those who’ve lost their voice. Who are hiding. Who are ashamed. Who are hurting.

That’s not who you are … you were meant for more! Let me encourage you to speak out. Meet with a trusted friend, a pastor, or a mentor. You can begin to heal by shining His Light into your dark places.

John 1:5 says this, “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness can never extinguish it.” In the verse above, from Matthew, it says, “By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God.” God sent His Son to be the Light of the world. And then we were charged to be the Light … to “bring out the God-colors in the world.”

We are the light of the world. Let’s begin to bring His healing power into our own dark places, so we can go into the world and shine His blinding light into every dark crevice the enemy is hiding out.


:: We Are ::
performed by Kari Jobe

Every secret, every shame
Every fear, every pain
Live inside the dark
But that’s not who we are
We are children of the day

So wake up sleeper, lift your head
We were meant for more than this
Fight the shadows conquer death
Make the most of the time we have left

:: chorus ::
We are the light of the world
We are the city on a hill
We are the light of the world
We gotta, we gotta, we gotta let the light shine

We are the light of the world
We are the city on a hill
We are the light of the world
We gotta, we gotta, we gotta let the light shine
Let the light shine, let the light shine

We are called to the spread the news
Tell the world the simple truth
Jesus came to save, there’s freedom in His Name
So let His love break through

:: chorus ::

We are the light
We are the light
We are the light
So let Your light shine brighter
We are the light
We are the light
We are the light
Jesus
You are the light
You are the light
You are the light
We will lift You higher
Shine shine shine

:: chorus ::

We gotta shine
We gotta shine (So let the light shine)
We gotta shine
We gotta shine (Let the light shine)
We gotta shine (Let the light shine)

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Posted in inspiration, light, write it girl